I often wonder if fear is such a bad thing. I assume most of us have experienced fear at least once in our life. For a period of my life I feel like I was always living in fear. Fear of change, fear of uncertainty, fear of addiction, fear of disappointing. I realized that this fear I experienced throughout my life has only made me stronger, more confident and made me the person I’ve become today. Someone who loves a challenge, who loves the feeling of butterflies in my stomach, who is always up for adventure, and who lives their life in a state of Joy.
Over the years I’ve experienced change and struggle, but I’ve also overcome fears that held me back from the things I was so passionate about doing. I worked corporate for 15 years and had a very successful career. I have a lot to be proud of, but during that period I was faced with a lot of challenges. I was in an industry that I didn’t know a lot about at the time, so you could say my confidence was pretty low. As time went on, I got more clear, I started to release my fear, and was able to step into my power and own my position. Life was good!
I’ve been practicing yoga and meditation for 15 years. In 2010 I took my first 200-hour teacher training. Talk about being scared! I was terrified! I actually didn’t enroll in this to become a teacher, but I desired a better understanding for my practice. Low and behold, I fell in love with the idea of teaching. I can remember to this day the way I felt when I taught my first class… scared as shit!! And, you know what… It was awful, but I survived! I rushed it, I felt like I was going to pass out, I was full of FEAR. That was such a blessing to this day. I learned that my fear made me strive to become a better teacher, it made me stay connected to my own practice, and overtime I grew and those feelings started to subside. I eventually completed my 500-hour teacher training and my 750-hour yoga therapy program early this year, but even though I was more confident as the years past, I was still scared. I’ve come to realize I LOVE getting butterflies in my stomach to this day, I love feeling scared when I take on a new client, I love the feeling of fear when I change something in my business, because I know that I still care and love what I do. If I didn’t have fear, doubt, or didn’t feel scared then I know my passion and desire is no longer there.
Which leads me to last year. I always knew I would start my own business, but like everyone else I’m sure… It has to be the right time. Is there really such a thing as the right time? I’ve always been a planner so in my mind I would eventually find that right time. The company I worked for decided to close at the end of 2013. I stayed until April 2014, and then BAM… After 15 years in the corporate world and doing my business part-time here was little ol’ me starting my own business full-time. This was for real! I kept saying to myself, this was one year to soon. Now, ask me if I was full of fear. Ummmm… terrified to say the least! Scared out of my mind! The monkey mind began, the doubt, the ego, you name it. All along I kept telling myself that things happen for a reason. God has a plan for me and that was to follow my heart. To listen to my gut and follow my passion. That I can do this! You know what, God was right! I can do it and I did do it!
I still get fear, scared, butterflies in my belly, doubt, worry, stress, and anxiety. Now, I just look that as a test. What can I do today to move past this. Should I shift my thoughts, pray, meditate, exercise, or all of the above. Remember, without a little fear in your life you’ll never take the leap to do something that lights you up. That fuels that fire in your belly. That scares the shit out of you.
I challenge you to do something that scares you, that causes you fear. You might just surprise yourself!
To living healthy, fearless and free and living a life you love and desire.
Love & Gratitude,